During my time as a clinical psychologist working as a federal employee before, during, and after the COVID-19 pandemic, I noticed that many of our clients didn’t have mental health diagnoses. However, they came to therapy because they needed support and clarity…and didn’t know where else to get it. And, I didn’t know where else to send them.

As part of a management training program during my time in the federal government, I participated in my first round of Executive Coaching. I was having difficulties with a supervisor and was feeling frustrated by a few co-workers. My coach was phenomenal! She was warm and caring, but also firm and willing to hold me accountable to take action that I said I would take. She helped me identify what I could control in these work interactions as well as how to change my perspective and manage my stress more effectively. She also helped me learn that I didn’t know how to appropriately express my frustration (and anger, at times) at work, which kept me from speaking up for myself and led me to feel frustrated in other areas of life (i.e. at home, with friends, in my own head, etc.). Through some role playing, journaling, and those illuminating coaching questions, I picked up the skills that I needed to be successful in work, at home, and in my own thoughts.

As a part of another training (and about a year later), I entered my second episode of coaching. This coach was equally as warm, but seemed more interested in engaging in what felt more like therapy…which I did not sign up for, this time. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been in therapy a handful of times, but this person was a certified coach, not a licensed mental health provider. The differences between my experiences had me curious about what it took to become a coach and why I didn’t like coaching when it felt like lightweight therapy. So, I enrolled in a coaching training program.

I earned my certification in professional coaching from iPEC in 2023. During that year long journey, I was reminded of how important it is to be aligned with my values. And, when I felt conflict, it was partially due to me not intentionally living my values. Also, I noticed that I was not consistently showing up how I wanted in the life that I worked so hard to create. Although I was serving others in that work role in mostly meaningful ways, I was not serving myself. I was not taking care of myself before taking care of others, which is a recipe for disaster.

Becoming a coach in addition to being a therapist has allowed me to honor my values of helping others, working hard, and being intentional in my life. I certainly don’t always “get it right”… just ask my son about morning drop offs -overall, they’re much better, now. And I try to give myself the time and space to consistently show up as that better version of me, everywhere I choose to be. It’s a process for us all!